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April

March 28, 2004
Man, I can't believe it's been this long since I've written - how'd I miss February?! Well, January and February were both great months. Parties were off the hook, and Gillian and I got out to the Wesside!! NBA All-Star Weekend was in LA, of course. It didn't have the same feel as, say, D.C. but it was still fresh. And, San Diego was hot (not literally - it was brick in SoCal!). Thanks, again to Kim Tre and the folks at TROOP for providing the kid with gear for the trip... Jalen is now on haircut #3 and is singing like he's auditioning for American Idol. His favorite move is making the "six fingers" gesture while dancing to "Hotel." We're working on it...

One of my favorite exercises while teaching was to have students write letters to themselves in the beginning of each year about where they were then, where they hoped to be, etc. The fun was in reading those months later to see how much has changed. Reading my last statement written barely two months ago reveals a lot about what has gone on in that time. It's probably appropriate to borrow a lesson from, well, myself. Enjoy!

- Frank Dux

P.S. We'll be celebrating the big 3-0 on Saturday, April 24th. Look for details . . . For now, birthday shouts (mostly belated at this point): My Ace Boons Big Deed and Mr. Tantrum, my girl Brande (congrats on school, B!), Dre (Freedom!), Tracy R., Lori ("Crush On You" kills it!), Joanna, Sista Sher, Kerry, Oscela, Seth, Makonnen (big up on the wedding, Star), Chris M, Tanya F., Felix, and my main man, Pop Dukes.

"Letter to Self"

Big VV -

What's going on, man? In two weeks, you'll be Big V3(0) - yikes. No worries man, just keep the important pieces in place and everything will be cool.

I'm writing because I'm curious to know what your thoughts are on the recent situation. No, not the Final Four - we know you picked three of four, stop boasting - I'm talking about what went down at the club you don't wish to implicate by name but swear you'll never GO there again . . . Yeah, right, that situation. How are you feeling about all of that? I'll tell you my thoughts...

Overall, the main feeling was frustration. Not frustration from losing a job. Not frustration from being told it was a decision based on music when you know that wasn't the case. This was a larger frustration - regarding the state of affairs in our world, at least in our City.

I thought Abercrombie & Fitch showed some real onions when they stood behind racist employment policies: Hey, this is the clientele we are targeting, so these are the people we want in our brochures and in the visible jobs in our stores. Then, I went to my party promotion's site to view the photos from that night - you would think we weren't even there. How does a promotion (and a space) make 1/4 of their party disappear? Why would a promotion want to... Oh, I didn't even wonder what the "A&F" on the owner's chest meant...

Is this really where we are? In 2004? There was a time not too long ago when restaurants would post signs that read, "Whites Only," or "No Negroes Allowed." I thought we were far removed from that. Gillian was quick to point out that even the famed Cotton Club in Harlem allowed Blacks to perform, but wouldn't let them in as guests. So, that's it, huh? Van Vader can perform for your spot, but can't invite his people...

I'm not really surprised at the club's official or unofficial policy. Brothers aren't really fooled into thinking that dress codes are only enforced to have guests 'look nice.' I mean, how many white guys have to walk in ahead of you wearing tattered blue jeans and sneakers before you realize that your brand new boots and crisp black jeans are probably not what got you turned away?

It's too simple to conclude that all of this boils down to money and spending power. It's not just about who drops the most loot at the bar. This is the Abercrombie Approach at work: We know the crowd we want, and what's more, we know the crowd we don't want. They've pulled the signs off the front of the doors and moved them to the employee manuals. And, they're getting away with it...

It's frustrating that folks don't see the upside of creating that balance. What I need you to explain to me is the difference between the spots of the 60's and those of today. Seems like the tactics have changed, but the results are the same...

Anyway, man - you tell me what's good.